I'm back. I had to take a little time off for myself. I really enjoyed my time away from the computer. I highly recommend it. I got some sun, read a few books, got some (much needed!) housework out of the way, and even wrote some real letters. Letters with a pen and paper! I know! It's amazing!
I find that I assume that people automatically know how I'm doing because of my journal, but the people closest to me in my life deserve more. So, I've been writing letters. I thought I'd print some of them up. I saw this in a journal once and I thought i'd be pretty neat.
Even though you're the stupid bitch in my well, you're also my closest friend these days. You listen to me like no one else in my life ever has. I really enjoy our late-night talks that go on for hours and how you listen to my poetry. And, you know, you're right. Sometimes my iambic pentameter is a bit off. I really shouldn't have poked you with a stick for saying that. I owe you one on that.
The other night I had a dream that you escaped and someone else shoved you in their van and hid you in their well and tried to kill you. First I was just mad at you for being so stupid that you'd get shoved in a van twice, but then I was just angry that someone read my journal, found out that you had escaped, knew how good you were in a well and then stole you for their own well. I mean, killing you was completely my idea, and the only reason anyone else would want to kill you was because I came up with the idea. Then I woke up and realized it was all a dream and was almost thankful that you were still in my well and that I hadn't killed you yet. NOt because I wanted more time with you, but because I remembered I hadn't bought any batteries for my digital camera yet and I do need to take pictures when the time comes. It helps with the patterns if I can see what you looked like before I chopped you up.
YOu understand, I"m sure.
I really do love you the mostest. There is no other puppy as pretty and as special as you are. Tonight you and I will have a special treat during Millionaire. I won't ruin it, but you'd better wear your best fur for the occasion! Kisses! More kisses! All the kisses!
Pick me for Best New Journal. NOrmally I wouldn't ask for such a thing, but every time I re-read over I'm the ONly One with the Lotion, tears come to my eyes. REal tears. In my eyes. And I don't just cry like a pussy over everything. But when I read my words there... I mean, my words, staring back at me, raw like blood on the screen... I mean, I just feel all that pain and I cry. And that deserves an award, I think. Plus you stupid people put the panel's names up there in a list and it's not so hard to find all of them one by one and skin them alive. I'm just sayin'. Yo.
I'm sorry about how upset I got the last time that I wrote. I'm just feeling very vulnearable with my web space lately, and maybe I took it out on some of you. I'd much rather not go into it, but there are some people that think they have the right to take more of my life than I want to give. I hope that the rest of you don't take things too personally. Like I said, it has nothing to do with you. But, and I'm not saying any names, but if CEG in DB, GL does'nt back the fuck up, she's going to find herself without an ass. THat's really all I have to say about that. Please stop writing and asking for more information. It only makes me want to write more cryptic entries that hint at what's wrong and how I really feel. And if I do that, I'll lose respect in myself. And when my self-esteem goes down, the body count goes up. I mean, it's in your hands, the lives. If you don't care, then I won't either.
Sorry So Sloppy,
Dear people that bought t-shirts,
YOu rock. Now, buy a mousepad before I eat your lip.