Gping to Journalcon...

I"m BACK!!!!!!

Who missed me?

I missed you all so very much, but things got crazy here, as they often do and then there were all kinds of sad things happening and I've pretty much gone from the best parts to the worst parts of my life and now it's all sort of settled out and I hope I'm not being too vague about it.

I just love being in love and I love the pain that love causes because it's how I know that I'm truly alive.

I should explain where I've been. See, Catherine got out of her well, which some of you warned me was going to happen but I told you to fuck off and mind your own business and it turns out you were right when I totally thought you were just being assholes, but she was making footholes with those new strappy shoes I bought her and not wearing them to break them in for me. So, she totally climbed out while I was watching a Jack Lemmon retrospective.

I had to find her. My fucking Catherine was out of her well and I panicked in a way that was very ugly. Even Precious was concerned, and she usually is cool as a cucumber.

Anyway, I had to infiltrate a high school by posing as a student. My name was Cassie and I preteded to be very interested in Biology. Ha! Get it! Anyway, that's where I met a boy. His name was Peter and he had the best hands and he was really good at dissection and I just totally melted when I looked into his protective goggles. We did extra study sessions and we sniffed the famaldahyde together and the next thing I knew I was going to prom! Me!!! Prom!!!

I know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh, I wore the best outfit that I made myself out of this Brownie troop that was harrassing me for an old order of Samoas that I never got around to paying for. I wore a strapless number with a deep plunging neckline and a bustle. I made Peter a tiny ribbon to wear on his lapel.

Oh, how we danced. We danced all night long. I can't tell you what happened at the after-prom party because I made a promise, but let's just say Peter won't ever forget it!

Unfortunately, I got exposed during graduation ceremony becuase that's when Catherine brought police officials and tried to finger me right there, that stupid bitch. I ran up there and grabbed her by the hair and pulled her away, shouting loving words to sweet Peter, who I won't get to see again for at least three weeks. Fucking Catherine ruined what might have been the most perfect time in my life. She's so selfish. You know, I never got to have a normal high school experience. People picked on me and I wasn't very popular and I cried a lot. This was my moment to fix all of that and she had to call the fucking cops.

I poked her with a stick but good for that one.

Peter's on some vacation or something, but I'm all ready to go and get him when he gets home. I'm sure he'll like it here, once he gets used to it. We all do.

Anyway, I'm glad Catherine's back because it's a bitch to get a housesitter, and now I can go to Journalcon without worrying about Precious.

I'm really happy about how much my writing has improvied since I started this journal.

I'm so excited about Journalcon. I was a little worried about flying for a little while there but I figure eventually I have to get on with my life and just accept the fact that eventually the FBI is going to find me and when that happens I just have to make sure I've got a good lawyer.

So, I'm just about packed. This is so exciting, y'all. Finally putting a face to everyone that I read. The people! The laughs! The drunken antics!

First of all I didn't decide to go to Journalcon until too late, so I don't have accomodations. So I know it's asking a lot, but it'd be totally cool if someone could let me sleep on the floor. I don't take up much space. I'm prepared to offer you a shirt or some gloves I made recently in exchange for the favor. Everyone loves swag!!

I'm just so excited to meet all these people. I've been doing a lot of lurking on three way action, even though those assholes sara and stee keep shutting down my topics (I don't know if my penis is big enough! it's a legitimate question! god!). So I'm excited to meet all those people. I hear there's a three way action get together. That'll be the coolest.

How big do you guys think Anna Beth really is? Like, could she make a hat?

Here's a partial list of some of the people I'm excited to see (I'm not sure if all of these people are going or not, but I'm hoping!)

  • rob
  • dana
  • hannah
  • suzy
  • pinapple girl
  • emily (oh, sweet emily. come to meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.)
  • omar.
  • my drivel's kelly
  • weng chung (i'd like to give her a pice of my mind for being such a bitch on hissyfit)
  • allison
  • alllison's mom
  • shelleyness
  • lance bass
  • emily
  • the guy who invented lamps that bend
  • mighty kymm
  • ophelia z
  • dreama (this time i won't be ignored)
  • someone to hold me
  • the girl that died of leukemia a few months ago that everyone's so sad about
  • xeney
  • wendy

How much fun would that be? Oh. God. It's so soon. I should get my hair done. I wish I didn't bite my nails so much.

I hope they ask me to speak. the transgender serial killer community is not well-represented. I have a good insight into a type of person you may not normally get to meet. Wait. Can I take my nail clippers? Dammit. I think I need to go repack. I've got my toothpaste. I remembered that.

I can't think of anything else to say, but I'm so nervous about going. I hope everyone gets along and I make lots of new friends!

Please let me sleep on your floor. I'll be good. email me. My email addres works now, by the way. I can't believve those hotmail fuckers deactivated it.