October 21, 2008
(hee hee) x 3
Dana: Happy birthday, Allison.
Pamie: Yeah, happy birthday. That food was so good.
Allison: Thanks. I love this place. Scott and I come here all the time. It's kind of ridiculous. One time last week, we came in for lunch and dinner.
Dana: You must come in here a lot, because when you were parking the car we told them, "It's our friend's birthday." And they went, "Oh, it's Allison's birthday?"
Allison: That's... well, yeah, I come here way too often. But, y'all, I'm so good. I didn't come here today, and I didn't come here yesterday.
(beat)
Pamie: Allison. It is today. And you're here now.
Dana: Yeah, and didn't you come here yesterday?
Allison: Oh, crap.
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Gritty: That's it! Get your ass on her!
Pamie: Those two girls up on the track are so small.
Gritty: I know. Not an ass between them.
Pamie: Just a bunch of arms. Look at all their arms!
Gritty: It does look like they have a lot of arms.
Pamie: No ass, but eight arms. Wait. No, they do have eight arms. Wait. No, they have... they have... two girls have four arms, right? No, I was right the first time. Eight arms.
Gritty: Wow.
Pamie: Two girls... oh. No. Four arms.
Gritty (Patting my helmet): It's been a rough week.
Pamie: Maybe I was thinking limbs.
Gritty: You've been hit in the head a lot. It's okay. I understand.
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Cat: Pamie, I think you should have a baby. Oh! Yes! I just came up with that, but it's true. I want you to have a baby. Right now.
Dana: No.
Pamie: What? Why?
Cat (clapping with glee): Because then I can hold it!
Pamie: Well, that makes sense. I'll get right on it.
Cat: And then the four of us can raise it together.
Dana: There are three of us sitting here.
Cat: Sara will want to help raise the baby.
Pamie (Sara voice): "Fine, Baby. I guess you're coming with me to the set tonight."
Dana: I'm the one trained to raise children. I'll have to use all of my professional knowledge when Pam just lets that kid run all over her.
Pamie: Isn't this my baby at all? And if I got pregnant, wouldn't there be someone else who would have a say in all of this?
Cat: Ooh! When the baby needs a stern talking to, or a man's opinion, I'll put on a mustache.
Pamie: Cat, you just want to wear a mustache.
Cat: Yeah. Yeah.
Pamie: Jeez. Then one day you won't be able to find your mustache, and you'll be walking around with your finger looped your finger over your mouth.
Cat: Ooh, that'll work. (Looping finger over mouth, in deep voice:) "What seems to be the problem, Baby? What can Daddymommy do for you?"
Dana (disgusted): Ohmigod, I'm voting Yes on Prop 8.
(Watch Sara's ultra-steamy-lesbianific House episode airing tonight!)
Posted by pamie at 7:13 AM
