a quiet time

and taylor checks in.
29 August 2000

Happy Birthday, Mommy. Hope the new job isn't working you too hard.

So, I mentioned briefly yesterday that I lost my voice. I really lost my voice, though, and I can always tell when it sounds bad because the following always happens:

People wince when I say anything. They then ask if I'm in incredible pain. They swallow often when I talk, or they clear their throats, as I assume they're wondering if they can catch my laryngitis.

People start talking quieter and quieter as we have a conversation. By the end of it, it sounds like two people whispering conspiratorially. "You don't have to speak quietly," I keep telling them.

This didn't stop me from making several phone calls yesterday, though, because I'm a masochist like that.

"I kind of like it," Tyson said. "Very Kathleen Turner."

I always get that Kathleen Turner/ Demi Moore, and I'm not sure which one is the more desirable. I suppose it could be much worse.

I'm having that post-vacation depression where I'm sad that I'm not gearing up to have this trip again. I went and put my pictures in for developing, even my aspen pictures. D'oh! I just remembered that I asked for my Aspen pictures on CD as well, when I didn't need them to be. Great. There's only like, six photos on each camera from Aspen, and I'm going to be paying ten dollars for a CD on each. On one camera I snapped six pictures of Cal and two of the Albertson's just to put pictures on the roll before I remembered that I only have to pay for pictures that actually developed. That means I'll have a CD of photos of the kitty litter aisle.

Maybe it'll come in handy for some splash page graphics. I don't know.

I always end up spending more money than I wanted to.

Bonjour.

It iz I, Taylor! I got bored with the pamie's dronings and ramblings about cash and photos and what not. I know thiz about photos: they are veryvery tasty, no?

I thought perhaps now would be a good time to tell you how I spent my summer vacation, az I haven't had much time to check in with you lovely people and see how are you doing. How are you doing, yes? All good, yes? Bon.

Okay. So.

I spent zee begining of zee vacation trying to learn how to make zee butt noises zat Cal is so good at. Alas, I am not the trumpeter zat he iz. Oh, he can make quite zee symphony after a particularly good stolen turkey sandwich from zee garbage can. I find myself with my arms out all stretched, straining and teary, looking up at zee celing and mumbling, "Gracias, Senore." I don't even know what zat is funny, but Pamie keeps telling me that a cat quoting Peter Shaffer is veryvery funny. I defer to her, az her job iz zee funny-funny, not mine.

Let's see. What else? I spent several days this summer worried that I had been abandoned. Either the Eric would be gone, or the pamie would be here. And usually when they were here all day long, there were other creatures that would be here too, ruining my pretty futon with zeir strange hair smells. Cal tries to lick off all of the foreign smells, but I can always tell it'z there. You never get that smell out of a pillow, no?

But I haven't been abandoned, and people are constantly filling my food bowl. I learned how to get up on a few new counters. One time I was able to lick my foot without having to hold it up with my other paw. I think I am slimming down, no? It iz very easy when that other creature eats everything in sight. He has to wash himself with a rag on a stick, yes? Mon dieu! He iz hiz own country.

Other summer notables include: getting a new brand of kitty litter, re-discovering the joy of fur on a piece of styrofoam, eating turkey straight out of zee plate, sitting under a windowsill for more than six hours in a row, knocking glasses of drink over and then deciding I wasn't thirsty anyway, and playing the "knock out the cable" game.

All in all, a very wonderful summer, no?

I'm very much enjoying our little advice feature, no? Ez fun, yes?

Send Pounce,
Taylor